a personal blog

and that's more of a warning than a blog title


myself is abegail | 21 | ph
Typical fangirl. Explorer. Introvert.

Thank you for dropping by and please know that I am writing to express myself. Honestly.




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It’s been nine years since I last set foot on that building. The change is drastic. It had vibrant colors and the ground seemed very spacious. The stairs though felt as if there should be a few steps more. I might be forgetting that I was in an elementary school.

If it wasn’t for the election day, I won’t be noticing the difference. Even the  classroom desk felt brand new though the chair is old.

 The election officer at my precinct is my grade one teacher. And I’m really happy that she still remembers me. I visited the spot where I used to skate at the 5th floor. Those were the days when shoes with wheels are very in. Haha!

Nostalgic feelings. I never thought election days could bring such.

But loving it.

Hi! I am Abe, a Civil Engineering student at PUP and right now, I am pursuing an utterly different kind of career.

I have been blogging and earning from it since I entered college. Surprisingly, it has been five years! If I were to calculate the amount of money that I get through blogging, I can buy a MacBook Air by now and the rest goes to my mother. Too bad I can’t resist to immediately use the money that I earned. :(

I get benefits from blogging but at the same time, I have sacrificed some of my precious time for it. There are times when I only blog and not do my homework. Other times, I blog late and wake up late for class the next day. I know it’s not healthy so don’t follow me. Okay?

I still blog but I rarely get sponsorships anymore which for me, is kind of a blessing because it made me focus on other things now.

I cosplay and I have a job! :)

I teach Korean students the English language! I love everything about it! Though I only had sub-classes for now because I’m still a newbie. But the training itself is really fun and enjoyable. I really love what i’m doing in my job. I might have to sacrifice more of my time this time but I really want to pursue it.

The people I work with are really very genuinely nice. I can even joke with our Team Manager which for me is kind of surreal because TMs should be like the highest among the high on the floor but in here, they are very approachable and funny.

I love the students. Sometimes when a teacher is absent, I got to be a substitute teacher and the feeling is really very different from a subclass. I easily get attach to people and these students who were at theirs houses in Korea are not an exception. They’re so cute!!

The workload is not that heavy. A lot of regular teachers have mentioned that to us a lot of times. And I am looking forward to mentioning it to future trainees someday. :)

Yet, my main goal is to still be a licensed civil engineer someday. I am just enjoying what I have right now. Hihi.

I never actually realized how busy I was at work until I noticed that I have been watching so much Kings of Restoration. I go home at around 2pm and will catch up on sleep if possible. Normally, I wake up at around 6pm, watch the news and do whatever. And then at night, I’ll watch with my sister and there, I’ll just find myself watching people bringing old stuff to these guys and these guys will turn it into something new. I haven’t got the chance to watch my favorite late night dramas since I started working because I have to wake up really early. But  I can say that I am enjoying this show. As well as Pawn Stars. Hihi. I wonder how much would a sacagawea coin cost?

Elevator buttons and morning air…

While waiting for the lift, I actually, softly sang that during my first day at work. Now, it has been 4 weeks since.

I never thought I would love it this early but honestly, I really enjoyed going to work everyday. Maybe because the people are really nice and the work load is not that heavy.

But just as they say, we can’t have it all. Just as I was starting to build a relationship with my co-trainees, we were confounded by the news that some of us will be transferred to the PM shift which means we won’t get to be together at work anymore. Add to that, my Team Leader will be having her last day at work tomorrow.

It’s my first job. My first ever actual life outside of school and my family. I am still struggling on how to survive this world full of very different people. I was alone until I met them and now, they’re leaving. This early.

These happenings made me realize that indeed, I am at the real world already. At school, I get to be with my bestfriends all the time but here, there’s no assurance that the people you meet first will be with you up to the end.

 Still, I am very thankful for the experience that we had. Especially the things that my TL thought me. Apart from the teaching and English fluency stuff, in that span of time, she had thought me a lot. She might not have planned it but I think she somehow prepared me for things like these. 

Way to go TL! Best of luck for your teaching career at Mirriam! :)

 

“In the real world, people really do come and go.” -TL Julie

I don’t know a lot of anime. I can only sing-along with TV size soundtracks. I fail to have this cute tone when I say “kawaii!” and “Ohayo!” is the only Japanese term that I often use to greet my friends (yeah, even at night). I do have this list of to-watch anime though I haven’t really watched a lot of it. I still fail to recognize a lot of characters during a cosplay convention that’s why I am not claiming to be an otaku. But I want to get there.

All I know is that I love anime. Not too many but those I love, I patronize dearly.The anime which tops my list is Shaman King.

I understand that not a lot of people know about this anime because it came out ages ago. I was in elementary when I got hooked to this anime and now that I am in college, I still can’t find any merch with Shaman King characters in it. But I still love it. Hao Asakura especially. :)

That’s why during the recently held Ozine fest 2013 where by the way I cosplayed on, I really got touched (almost strangingly teary-eyed or crazy for short) when I saw two Shaman Kincg cosplayers. I mean, SRSLY? I was like “OMG! I got to have a picture with Lee Pai Long!” and “Please, please, please take a photo of me with Anna!!”

I literally fangirl-ed over them I almost freaked Anna out. Lee Pai Long was chill and even asked for a photo with me also. That was really a very heartwarming moment. YES. THAT. IS.

I am now planning to cosplay Hao Asakura just because! :3

  • me: *saves another tutorial/reference ill probably never use*

Is it really the waiting that makes it hard? Or the ugly truth that we just couldn’t have what we want the moment that we really want it? The bitter realization that while others happily enjoys the very same thing that you’ve been longing for so long, there you are watching the hands of time pass you by, leaving you with the same unfulfilled dreams and a boring reality.

I woke up after a sound sleep. Oh how I longed to sleep that long since I started working. By the scattered blanket and sweat on my neck and chest and forehead and everywhere, I suspect the summer heat is what disrupted me from my lovely dream. Fuck you summer heat.

He was with me again.

Everything was PERFECT. Stress on the perfect because it’s almost painful not to call it that way considering that I really, really feel that way when I’m with him. There’s just no other words that can describe this.

His freshness, his smile, his (unfunny) jokes, his sarcasm, his honest and brave compliments. How can I ever get rid of that? How can I ever stop remembering the person who makes me feel frustrated yet appreciated at the same time.

If I’ll have to sleep forever just to be with him again, I’d happily oblige. Knowing that I’ll never experience those anymore again. Knowing full well that I’ll never be with him again. Oh shit, this is really painful than I thought. Shit.